


Arm Candy

by Xyriath



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Ed-level cursing, Fancy dinners, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-14
Updated: 2016-02-14
Packaged: 2018-05-20 07:26:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5996817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xyriath/pseuds/Xyriath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I have to admit, Edward, I’m not entirely used to being the one who is arm decoration at a formal event.”</p><p>“Yeah, well, it’s about damn time you learned how to be.  I’m the guest of honor now, bastard.”</p><p>[Written for Valentine's Day 2016!]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Arm Candy

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a collaboration with Sassyfirealchemist, who did [this beautiful art!](http://sassyfirealchemist.tumblr.com/post/139264566057/happy-valentines-did-an-awesome-colab-with)
> 
>  

“I have to admit, Edward, I’m not entirely used to being the one who is arm decoration at a formal event.”

“Yeah, well, it’s about damn time you learned how to be. _I’m_ the guest of honor now, bastard.”

Roy rolled his eyes, tolerantly amused, and reached out to take Ed’s offered arm.

“I do find it fitting that the only way you’ve ever managed to secure that position is after _founding_ the organization in question.”

Ed scoffed. “Shut the fuck up and come make me look important.”

Roy made a faux-annoyed noise, but followed as Ed strutted over to a group of well-dressed older gentlemen. Ed flashed them a blinding grin as he placed them firmly into their line of sight.

“Mister Elric!” one of the men proclaimed. “What a fine event this is. Who would have thought, an alchemic foundation, and a _prestigious_ one at that, outside the clutches of the military! It’s about time someone wrenched away their monopoly on the science. It’s led only to stagnation, I say!”

Roy made a choking, coughing noise. Ed reached out subtly with his foot and jammed a heel into Roy’s toe.

“And who is this?” another one of them asked, and Ed cut in smoothly before Roy could.

“This is my date, Roy.” Ed intentionally left the “general” out, as well as the last name. No need to let these people know that they _were_ , in fact, in military company, albeit not in official capacity. “He’s a fair hand at alchemy, too, but not the society.”

“Pity. We could use more talented alchemists.”

Ed just grinned. “You say that after meeting the people here? Here I’m startin’ to think that the cream of the crop ain’t good enough for you.”

“Oh, no, heavens no! Indeed, you’ve completely outperformed our expectations, and they were quite high in the first place.”

“And I did it on almost nothin’, too.” Ed smirked, winking at them. “Doesn’t it just make you curious, what I could do with even more?”

—

“What?”

Ed knew that his expression was less innocent than he was going for—or, rather, that it was far _too_ innocent, which was basically the same thing—but it was worth it, Roy’s expression after Ed walked away from the men with several million more pledged cenz in donations.

“What was _that?_ ”

Ed shrugged, sipping a flute of champagne. “You think I spent _all_ my time at those military formals getting drunk off my ass?”

“Well—“

“Don’t fucking answer that. Anyway, you’re not the only person who can schmooze. It comes in handy.”

“I suppose you learned from the best.”

“Or the worst, depending on how you look at it. But either way.” Ed put on his most pretentious voice. “The Curtis-Hohenheim Alchemical Advancement and Study Society thanks you for your contribution. It is, in part, thanks to you, that our Valentine’s benefit was a success!”

“Is this your romantic gift to me? A rare compliment?”

“No, it’s only to give you a false sense of confidence before I fuckin’ break you later.”

“I look forward to it.”

—

Really, the stumbling as the two of them headed up to their apartment was _entirely_ due to automail and had _nothing_ to do with Ed’s inebriation.

“Stop fucking laughing! I’m not _that_ drunk!”

“I hope not.” The fucker was still laughing. “Not with what I have planned for _you_ tonight.”

They did manage to stumble their way inside with minimum further mishap, and when Roy snatched up the bottle of wine and bouquet of flowers he had presented Ed with earlier, Ed decided he was inclined to forgive him.

They kicked off their shoes, and really, one of the reasons Ed loved Roy so much was that, without preamble, he went to the kitchen and came back with a bowl of chocolate covered strawberries, a corkscrew, and some glasses.

He then proceeded to use his flame alchemy to light all of the candles in the bedroom.   _Candles._  What a fucking sap.

And he didn’t even comment that Ed had just come back from a banquet where he had eaten a good half of Gracia’s dishes.

(Ed considered her to be one of his greatest triumphs: though Roy had been attempting to woo her into the State Alchemist program for years, it had been the nonmilitary draw of CHAASS that had won her, with not just its allowance of her domestic and entertainment-based alchemy, but its encouragement.)

Two glasses of wine in, and Ed was practically a purring cat, draped over Roy’s lap as he bit delicately into one of the fruits.

“See? I _told_ you we could have a romantic evening even with the party,” Ed drawled, mouth full.

Roy’s hand slid up Ed’s thigh, and Ed just raised an eyebrow when it came to rest on his ass, thumb hooking in his belt loop before starting to move again—this time downward, pulling slowly at the pants.

Ed simply leaned forward, murmuring, “If this is how you’re askin’ to spend the rest of the night? I ain’t complainin’.”

And with a smirk that Roy immediately matched, Ed leaned forward to take the rest of the strawberry into his mouth.


End file.
